9 tips for starting over after a breakup with a narcissistic pervert

If being in a relationship with a narcissistic pervert is difficult, it is even more so when you have decided to leave him. Indeed, these manipulative individuals find themselves with nothing when their victims leave them, which explains why they are ready to do anything to keep them under their control.

If you’ve recently successfully broken up with a narcissistic pervert , you can’t be sure that he’ll get the message and leave you alone once and for all. So how can you get over this breakup? Can we finally rest at some point?

Complications after the breakup, will it ever stop?

Complications after a breakup with a narcissistic pervert, will it ever end? Can we finally turn the page on difficulties after a toxic relationship with a manipulative or violent narcissistic pervert?

Choosing to end a toxic relationship with a manipulative or violent narcissistic pervert can definitely be the right thing to do, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. After the complications of this breakup, it will likely be difficult to heal emotionally if there has been abuse in the relationship. You will probably have to go through an emotional healing process.

How to rebuild emotionally after the breakup?

If you are considering leaving, or have recently left, a toxic relationship, the next step in the process is healing. While everyone’s recovery is different, here are 9 tips on how to heal from a toxic relationship and then start anew:

  1. Feel your emotions. Allow yourself to be upset and feel your emotions when you need them. Give yourself all the time you need to feel everything you need to feel. By trying to suppress the emotions you are feeling, you risk prolonging your healing. Giving yourself space to feel and process your feelings is the first step in beginning to heal from the relationship.
  2. Don’t blame yourself.  It’s not your fault that someone else treated you badly. You couldn’t know what was going to happen. Therefore, learning not to blame or forgive yourself (if you’ve ever been hard on yourself) is an essential step in recovering from an unhealthy relationship.
  3. Be sure to surround yourself with positive people.  Being able to spend time with people you have a healthy relationship with and can trust can be very beneficial. If you’re feeling lonely, call on them when you need a pick-me-up.
  4. Rediscover your true identity. Toxic relationships can make you forget who you really are and what you love outside of the relationship. Once you’re out of an unhealthy relationship, it’s time to prioritize your happiness and get back to doing what you love. You were someone before the relationship, and you’re still someone after the relationship.
  5. Take care of yourself. Toxic relationships can have a huge impact on a survivor’s emotional and physical well-being. Many people stop taking care of themselves when they are in a toxic relationship. After a breakup, try to take time for yourself and do things that you really want to do.
  6. Be kind to yourself. Instead of judging yourself and speaking harshly to yourself, try to talk to yourself like you would talk to someone you care about. Talking to each other with kindness, compassion, and forgiveness can be one of the best forms of self-care. Be gentle with yourself as you work on your recovery and beyond.
  7. Focus on your resilience.  When coming out of a toxic relationship, try not to see yourself as a victim, but rather as a strong, resilient person  who can focus on themselves and their needs.
  8. Be patient with yourself. The road to healing is not always a straight line and the healing process is different for everyone. Some days will be harder than others, but allow yourself to take all the time you need to feel better.
  9. Focus on the present. Recovery is an unpredictable process. Instead of trying to plan for the future or dwell on the past, focus on your current situation. Are you happy right now? What can you do to improve the present moment? Listen to what your body needs when it needs it.

Even if it can be difficult to rebuild your life afterwards. You are a survivor, and this relationship does not need to define you or your life. Then, when you decide you’re ready to seek new relationships (romantic or platonic), you can set new boundaries to help you create the relationships you want and deserve.