I Will Help You All My Life: Is Commitment to the Relationship a Sacrifice or an Act of Love?

She had an accident in front of her eyes. She was no longer moving. In an instant, they both realized that this accident had caused her to lose the use of her legs for life. At this moment when everything seems to be collapsing, in an indefinable momentum her companion leaned over her and said to her: I will help you all my life.

It is the story of a great sportswoman who recounts the love of her companion who helped her overcome the accident of her life and who allowed her to go in her resilience. This resilience that gave her the impetus to continue to live accompanied in the most terrible moment of her life.

Behind this act of love through these words, we feel the thrill invade us. We then want to gain height because what immediately comes to us in these words “I will help you all my life” is the sense of giving of oneself for the other.

To seek, to feel something in oneself that one has never really experienced before in a love relationship, something that would come from the impossible because one has put up barriers before telling oneself that it does not look like a sacrifice but rather to the conscious and authentic commitment that we can feel in a relationship of love.

But where does this commitment come from? How does he clear this unknown path that comes to seek us deeply to invite us to reach out our hand in life to the one we love? What are those nuances to commitment that would detach us from sacrifice but instead illuminate our path of love towards the meaning of life?

Would the commitment in the common of our lives be the only one that we take at one time in our couple and which could be made sacred in marriage or would it be the one that comes to touch forgiveness in oneself to offer it to the love, to give it to the one who is in our heart?

When we fall in love , when we love someone, if we really want to build a foundation of love and move forward on the path together, we need to know the essence of loving commitment.

The 5 pillars of romantic commitment

There are encounters in his life that will take you out of your physical and inner celibacy and that will simply push you to build a love story . There will be those who will have no future and then the one who will come to fill your life, the one who will touch the fundamental issue in you, namely the meaning of love.

We could speak of amorous commitment. Hearing this word, some will shudder, be afraid of commitment because it could oppose freedom. “To commit” comes from “ingnadiare” in Latin which means “to undertake to provide evidence”. If from this medieval Latin word, we perceive the solid implication of having to prove things in front of the other, over the centuries, this word has known another direction going towards the meaning of the action of binding oneself by a promise. Then in the 20th century “commitment” is defined in the attitude of a person who puts his thought, his art or his actions at the service of a cause.

Commitment is scary, commitment can also appeal to this lack of investment that some may feel within their couple. Behind all this complexity, we should today speak of a new version of the loving commitment between the two partners, but also the commitment in love.

Amorous commitment is the pact of a complicity for two, alternating between fusional and fissional love where everyone has their place and manages to love each other in an aligned and balanced accompaniment.

Achieving together to weave this link which is that of a reciprocal commitment to an authentic, aligned and trusting relationship based on a base made up of 5 essential pillars.

The base of love is not the prerogative of an exclusive relationship, especially at the time of polyamory in many couples, I will rather speak of a conscious relationship which resides in the fact of asking from the start as a couple towards what type of romantic commitment you want to go together. This will avoid insecurity, disappointments, sadness, and leave them behind.

The base is to create all the soil of the relationship: to decide clearly together if you wish to accompany each other by being side by side and thus to make each of you two beings fully present to yourself and to the other.

For this, there are 5 pillars of the authentic relationship: emotional, sexual, financial, family and creative commitment.

1. Emotional engagement

When we begin a love story, we are marked by our past, our wounds with which we have worked in a personal and sometimes dual resilience . So inevitably, getting emotionally naked is like accepting in the mist of our tears that our partner sometimes comes to wipe them away or even make them more nourishing.

Love is a great booster for one’s own resilience in the face of life’s traumas. The emotional commitment comes to touch our intimate depth both in this double identity which amounts to being present for the other as soon as he needs and accepting to be fully oneself in front of the other in his sensitivity, his vulnerability, his unique presence welcomed by the one we love.

This emotional commitment can be destabilizing for many of us who have sometimes decided to protect ourselves from the other, but once you have grasped its full power, this commitment will offer a real space of security and elevation in love.

2. Sexual engagement

S*xual commitment is to guarantee your partner an environment of tenderness, hugs, intimate touches that will nourish both partners.

Indeed, lacking physical love in your relationship can be complicated to manage in the long term. So do not hesitate to express from the start in your relationship this need to engage together in this physical gift of love.

Communicative sexuality, the conscious rapprochement between the two partners allows a real connection which constitutes mutual trust and above all an intimate regeneration essential for the couple.

This commitment sincerely depends on your ability to give love but also to receive it. This coming and going is essential for the balance of the couple. This commitment is not sacrifice, it is the movement of an intimacy that you will build together and that no one will know apart from you two.

3. Financial commitment

Financial commitment is closely tied to your relationship with abundance in your life.

Money in the couple often appeals to the lack and investments in two which can put in your consciousness an accent of deprivation and limitation of your own freedom. But if you build from the start a financial plan based on abundance in the couple, in the balance of expenses. Money is fluid and will become a creation in the couple. Creating together in fluidity with money is a commitment that deserves a conscious duo.

4. Family commitment

Family commitment is one that appeals to our inner experience with our parents, our childhood environment.

We are going to look at the start for what would suit us in our home. The risk in this commitment is to respond more to the needs of children and to divert all romantic commitments towards those who will nourish the lives of children.

In the family commitment there is the place of your couple, how together you engage in the family. Keep your couple space in family engagement. Keep this complicity, this intimacy between two in the family without having it absorbed by the family environment. You must also know how to manage family separations , family recompositions while keeping your couple present.

5. Creative engagement with the world

This commitment is the creations of the couple, their life projects together.

This last commitment is based on the presence of the couple in the world. In a way, what trace, what birth of your work as a couple are you going to leave to the world? It is important that a couple have this commitment also when they talk about living together in the long term. Everything is possible in creation. It is the imprint that you will leave together in the world. There are creative couples, others who will be less in this dynamic. But it is important to also consider this commitment as a source of elevation in the couple.

All these commitments are deep and have a real connivance with the meaning that we wish to put in love.

The companion who tells her partner “I will help you all my life” has a supreme commitment in her heart that will navigate these pillars and go beyond the commitment of love. We will then speak of the commitment of love.

In view of these 5 pillars of love commitments, one could draw the backdrop of a sacrifice to one’s life and yet they are the fruit of a real awareness of the essence of commitment in love. .

In this dynamic of the commitment to two, it is to say indeed, that in the worst of the tests, the mourning, the physical loss of a part of oneself, that we are there for the other. There is behind this loving commitment all the meaning of life and faith that we put in love on our way of life.