After a relationship with a narcissistic pervert and psychological violence, many women feel fears when it comes to loving or being loved again. When the possibility of a new romantic relationship looms in our life, it triggers fears, often linked to our romantic past and our bad experiences.
If this is your case, remember that all relationships are different and it’s nearly impossible to predict the outcome. Don’t let your fears overwhelm you and don’t react impulsively.
Here are 2 keys to trusting a man again after a relationship with a narcissistic pervert and moving forward in his love life.
The first key is not to want to move too fast when you start a new relationship and to really take the time to know the people you have in front of you. It is very important not to be in a hurry, not to be in this cloud of fairy tales to which we are accustomed since childhood with the films of Walt Disney and the “beautiful stories” in classic and modern romantic books. where we would immediately have a “love at first sight” that would change everything.
Of course it can happen, it’s true, but there are also very beautiful relationships that are really built gradually!
Taking your time also allows you to overcome toxic relationships, that is to say those where the man you are going to meet will very quickly want to say that he wants a very serious relationship with you, that he loves you after a few days, precisely in this idea of a fairy tale where everything is magical at first sight.
“Time does things well, on all occasions. When you have patience, you have the greatest wealth, because you learn more by being patient and you receive more by waiting than by rushing. You get a good result no matter what you can do.
And precisely it is also for you to get to know yourself really, to target yourself to really be the man who a priori corresponds to you, that everything may seem magical immediately: the perverse narcissistic manipulator wedges himself in your steps to weave his web and better “understand” you.
So now, as you’ve already been there, why not change the mode of operation a bit, one step after another, during outings that are a little less traditional than the classic restaurant, for example for a first date?
Unless, of course, you are really fond of restaurants and I admit that this is my case in pretty settings by the sea or in the mountains… Treat yourself, that’s the main thing, but with emotional caution!
During a new appointment after your narcissistic pervert, take the time to do common activities that both of you like to give you this tranquility in the relationship and allow it to be built gradually and to know who you are. really have to do.
The second key which is the consequence of the first is not to deviate from your personal objectives and from what you are used to doing.
For example, if you have a sporting activity, you are used to seeing friends, you belong to a club, do not give up on that to spend more time with this man you have just met.
This will allow you to give time to this relationship, not to be acquired too quickly and to keep this emotional stability.
You know how important it is if you have been the victim of violence or a toxic relationship; you know that it is imperative to stabilize your life on a personal level and also at the level of your work, to preserve what is important to you in order to always keep this inner balance and not to topple when there will be crises. Because even in a balanced relationship, you have times when things don’t necessarily go well, when there are communication issues, milestones to cross, so as not to be destabilized and not fall back into the abyss that you have experienced. and this experience that you really don’t want to repeat.